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Since is Christmas, I thought I will be posting about something happy,

I even count my days to the happy days ahead,

I dont know how and what should I feel,

as much as i try to tell myself not to think about it and stay positve,

each time i close my eyes, it just come into my mind,

I cant even sleep despite only having 3 hours of sleep,

Why do I have to see it so narrowly?

I wish I could just get over it,

I wish even more you have not mention about it before,

I guess is because I really look forward to it really badly,

Staying patient and working hard,

I thought I could finally deserve a sweet treat,

A least something that motivates me before starting off a new year,

A completely new year facing the working life,

Which I still feel so mentally unprepared for it because I know the kinda pressure I am going to face daily,

I just want that motivation,

I really look forward to doing this with you,

I am not the usually so pestering type,

I have always learn to accept that sometimes thing do not go my way,

But I really want this so badly,

I couldnt accept still the reason why it didnt work out,

You may wonder that I could still proceed the plan with someone else,

Is not about doing it, is about this little wish and dream of mine,

It will just not be the same without you,

Maybe I felt this way is because I have been depress recently,

I feel so deprived of you,

I miss those times when you are around,

I thought I finally could have some solid and quality moment with you,

I just want to be away from this stress, some happy moment with you,

Why it just have to turn out this way?

I really feel so emotional and depress,

I dont know how to get out of it,

I am really trying hard, hence the consistent pestering despite you already tell me the answer.

Why do it always have to end up with disappoinment?

If this instant, someone can tell me what I could do to make it happen,

I would have really go all the way to do it, really..I really meant it,

I just want you around without any rush, without the constant need to check the time, and worry about receiving phone calls...

T_T

Christmas!

Finally the year is about to come to an end...

Reminisicing what I was doing last year around this time, I couldn't believe a year has passed since then. I remembered I was busy catching the TVB "No Regret" drama series and hoping for a better year ahead. No worries, no expectation and just the same wish.

For me, I love Christmas the most among all the festive season as I felt is the most magical festive season, the lights, the songs and the theme just make the festive felt so warm and merry. In order to make myself happy, I will buy a Christmas present for myself, because I never get what I want for Christmas and I never blame anyone for that! Moreover, Christmas usually come after my final exam and I think I deserve a reward for the hardwork during exam. Furtermore, I would have no holidays to go. How Christmas unfold every year just seems like a routine to me, the same old place for Christmas eve dinner, same food, same kinda expectation, same environment, same people, same present and on Christmas day itself, I sometimes even forget is actually Christmas!

That is because I still continue wishing for the same thing every Christmas, to spend a White Christmas with my special someone, underneath the falling snow and wishing each other a "Merry Christmas" when the clock strikes twelve followed by a warm hug...

Moving on from single to being attached, I thought Christmas is really going to be so different this year, I was imaginning it from the beginning of the year until the year end, I really thought my Christmas wish is goin to come true...

I guess I have not been a good boy afterall, I admit Im not really a good boy this year, Santa Claus just cannot grant my Christmas wish.


Dear Santa,

I no longer wish for a toy. Neither do I need anything fancy or expensive. If there is one thing you want fit into that Christmas sock, I wish is a...

Ticket.

A ticket that allow me to spend Christmas with Him, My special someone, a kiss and a warm hug underneath the falling snow. Ok, snow is optional~!

Nevertheless, it will always be my Christmas wish every year till it ever come true...and if it ever come true, I wish I can have it every year...

That is all I want for Christmas.

But as I once said, the simplest wish always tend not to come true...

I guess I just have to continue wishing harder and perhaps be a good boy next year. Hopefully Santa will grant my wish...